Seeing with new eyes...
So I’ve been on a spiritual path for a while now…off and on for fifteen years or so…a lot more on in the last three. I have had shifts and expansions, awakenings and dark nights of the soul. Boy what a wild ride it is…and for in as much as we may find ourselves uplifted to another consciousness perspective…it is in the maintenance of this awareness in which many of us get lost.
Now that we see from this new place…what does that mean?
My latest shift has been what I would call, an ego awakening. And since I’m such a fan of visual analogies…I’ll share with you the one I created around this experience. I felt like the best picture was that of an individual water well…you know, with stones for the wall. And that a person…who was asleep in their ego identity would be akin to a person stuck at the bottom of a well with chains and ropes and belts and string holding them attached to the walls and then wrapped around or attached to the person. Of course most of what the person does is twist and turn and arrange these bindings…but in the end, no matter how we arrange them or color them…they are still just keeping us in the well.
When we begin to see the programs and stories of the ego…we get a little distance…as though we are floating up a bit from the bottom of the well. We may at that time…see the stories and programs even more clearly… and begin to loosen some. While we are loosening some, others may tug harshly at our legs…pulling and tempting us back down into their swirling grip. It really is like the movie the Matrix. The ego game is really juicy.
It is when we see as many as we can…loosen ourselves from them and from feeding them that we are able to freely float up out of the well…into the ether…where we just ARE. Everything is just happening…we are not running any old programs of fear or anger or pain…we are just there experiencing everything as it is…for what it is…no judgement.
So what from here? That is my current question. I am learning to live here and to recognize when my consciousness is being pulled by ego. Important to realize, I think.
I am also thinking about the analogy of the well and wanting to expand on it…by also describing it like a tornado…because…we do interact with other people and other people’s bindings. Theirs get entangled with ours, their stories hit our buttons and our stories hit their buttons…there is so much entanglement going on, it’s astounding. And maybe our buttons are where our stories and programs are attached to us. Like wherever there’s a gap or hole in our energetic wholeness is where a program or binding has connected and that place…becomes a button…that can get pushed which ignites the energy of that program and potentially energetically ties you up with that person. Wow. Far out? It’s what I’m seeing in my imagination.
So…where are you in your awakening process?
The energy of love is so crystal clear. I’m speaking of the compassionate love, the divine love, that pure love that resides within all of us. It is different from possessive or jealous or conditional love. They are both strong emotions and we find them confused often. Perhaps you’ve heard it called “agape” love or just agape. It is love for all humanity, for mankind and its consciousness. And it resonates and emanates from within all of us…if we just get out of its way. It is inside us, all of us. Sometimes it just gets hidden or covered up by hurt and pain, but it’s STILL there….
Clean, calm, clear and vibrant…this energy is life affirming and sustaining. It is like a warm blanket from within and around us from without.
Imagine a world where love was the primary emotion shared among humans, among strangers.
What keeps us from this? Fear, spite, jealously, anger, disappointment, expectation, resentment, etc?
However, there is something you could do TODAY to chip away the barriers. Start today to open yourself up this amazing and healing energy that COULD heal our species, our modern world, our collective consciousness.
*Here’s the small step you can take today: Share your smile! Smile at a child, smile at a stranger, at anyone, at everyone!! Replace fear, anger and separateness with compassion, connectedness and agape love. Just let it flow…you’ll be amazed at how good it feels. Feel for it now in the middle of your body, uncover, unveil, and… let it SHINE….bright, warm and luminescent….and healing. If you liked this, please make a donation
The power of focus is amazing
As humans we have been given some amazing gifts – Love, Compassion, Empathy, etc. We have also been given some incredible abilities and tools. One such fabulous tool is FOCUS. Have you ever noticed what you get done when you’re focused? Once we focus our attention, our passion and our energy on something…things begin to happen and the more focused we are…the faster.
Ever called someone “single-minded”? What happens to the “single-minded” person? They get what they are after, don’t they? Sometimes these folks seem too focused, but they sure do get things done and they appear to move toward their goals quicker. There is a lot to be learned from these super-focused folks.
I spent many years with scattered attention. I’d like to think it wasn’t that noticeable to others (doubtful), but it sure had a big impact on my internal experience. After really looking at myself, my past and present and learning to view my behaviors objectively, I was able to get a handle on the issue. Through meditating, I saw that my brain behaves as computer in my head, spitting out information and taking itself on familiar rides around my mind and in order to wrangle my mind and attention, I had to see it objectively, as a machine just following old habits, pathways and ruts.
A little quiet does wonders...
I learned that listening to my consciousness first and then directing my mind was a better process for me. I now see and feel life very differently. I strive to live in and from my heart/soul/consciousness and use my brain for what it’s great at: calculating, planning etc. I now know that if I leave my experience of life up to my brain, it just goes round and round, seeking distraction, delving into emotional memories, creating drama, etc.
I wanted to learn to use my mind instead of letting it use me and that’s where focus comes in. Try the exercise below if you’d like to move along in the direction YOU choose, not just in a default direction.
The Exercise – The right questions
Paper, pen and some time alone.
Day to day life can be such a distraction that most people consider sitting down and figuring out what they want….too hard, or time-consuming. It’s actually not, given the right questions. That’s the work I do with Clarity Coaching. We are drilling down to find the core of what’s important. What are your priorities? What is most important to you? Are you doing things in your life that don’t serve your priorities?
Many times clients will say, “I’ve never really thoughts about that”. To me, that’s the best part, “Great, let’s think about it now”, I’ll say. Below is a brief version of Clarity Coaching:
Find a place you are comfortable, where you won’t be disturbed for at least 30 min. You’ll need paper and a pen/pencil.
1. Make a list – Write down your priorities, 7 or fewer.
2. Make a second list – List the actions/events/things you do in your life that you like.
3. Make a third list – List the actions/events/things you do that you don’t like.
4. Then cross reference, identify things from #2 and #3 that do not progress your priorities (from list 1)
5. If something is on your “do not like” list AND it does not progress your priorities, ask yourself why you do this thing? Is there someone else that could do it? Does it have to happen? Would someone else be better at it? Could someone share the responsibility with you? Brainstorm as to how you can remove all “do not like” items that do not progress your priorities OFF your list.
6. Okay…now look at your priorities and ask yourself; “Am I doing something every week or every day to progress my priorities?” If not, start to think about what you could do to move toward your priorities.
7. Now comes the fun part. What do you want to change in your life? What do you want more of? Do NOT judge. No one is watching. No one will see this unless you share it. What do you want to change, list these things.
8. While you’re doing this process, give yourself free reign to think and dream without self-recrimination, judgment or doubt. Do not argue for your limitations. This exercise needs to be FREE of limitation.
With focus, we get where we're going...
9. Now, look at what you want to change and what you want more of. Then see how those things fit in with your priorities. Look at how they fit in with your “like list” and your “do not like” list. Mark up the paper, write all over it, use colored pens if you want to. Circle things, cross out stuff.
10. Now take a new piece of paper and list your priorities, things you can do that progress you further, things you like to do an things you want more of. Do not list things you don’t like or if a priority includes a task you don’t like, include a plan to find help with that task. Then take this sheet and sketch out a schedule based on it, daily, weekly, monthly or what feels right to you. Just start slowly and set up your life’s activities with intention, focus and toward your priorities. Revisit this process ever so often to note your progress and to see what has changed or needs to change.
Watch as focus and consistency move you toward your goals and priorities with a speed you may never have seen! Watch out world, here you come!
Energy flows in and out of everything. It’s not just something that comes through the electric power lines. It’s in the air, the water, the earth and in US. Everything IS energy AND energy flows through everything. We do create some of our own…but more flows through us than we could ever create. To live the most amazing life and to feel really great: recognize, connect with and allow the flow to move FREELY through you! Everyone’s experience of energy flow is different. Whatever way you come to the experience, it can amaze you. You’ll wonder what you were doing before you learned about letting it flow. Whether you know it or not, whether you intentionally feel it or not, energy IS flowing through you, right now! When energy is free moving, it increases our vitality, our excitement and our movement through life.
Energy in action
Energy flows in (and sometimes out) through the top of your head, down through your body and out through your hands and feet. Generally, the flow is top down but it can flow in and out of our bodies in all directions. It flows in, co-mingles with the things in our body (thoughts, emotions, cells, matter such as food) and then moves out.
Think about an artist or a writer. They get in the “flow”. When they are in the “creative flow”, energy comes in, mingles with their specific set of thoughts, talents, emotions and vision and then comes out through them, into existence as a new creation on paper or in whatever way they express themselves.
When they speak of being “blocked”, it means that something, probably negative thoughts or emotions have temporarily impeded the flow through them.
Another example is an angry person. They have the flow happening, it comes through, mingles with their anger and negative thoughts and then comes out of them often in the form of violence or negative talk. Or what is worse; they don’t release the energy that is now co-mingled with their negativity and they simmer and simmer until something sets them off and they release it. BOOM! Energy must be released. It will come in and it WILL go out.
If you have a lot of negative emotions, thoughts, beliefs inside you, the energy flow will be slowed because negativity feeds on energy. It gets stuck and the product, released externally or kept internally, won’t be pretty. Positivity feeds on energy too…yet the outcome is far friendlier. Makes sense, doesn’t it? We have full dominion over what comes out of us.
Children are another great example- Why do they have so much energy? Because it flows through them easily. They don’t have any worries. They are not weighed down by all their angst, fear and anger. They are free of limitations of the mind or blocks to their energy. And they are amazing creators because they have not had their creativity judged or quashed. They do not criticize themselves yet. They have not learned to compare themselves to others, to think themselves unworthy. They are just in the flow of energy. It moves through them and they say what they think, feel what they feel, create what they like and don’t filter as adults do with a bunch of shoulds and shoudn’ts and harsh self judgments.
Getting a sense of your energy
To begin to get a sense or a feeling of the energy, think of yourself as a conduit, channel, pipe or tube. Close your eyes and imagine it coming down through your head (which it is always doing) and then sense/feel it filtering down through your body, out through your hands and feet. Give the energy a color if you like.
Get still for a moment and just sense it. Concentrate on your hands for a minute and the feeling of it moving out of your hands. Then focus on your feet. Feel the energy moving out through your feet.
Now, see it flowing, never stopping and while you’re feeling/sensing/seeing it, imagine where it might get blocked. Use your intuition and your creativity. You might be surprised by what ideas come to you. Keep track of where you sense/feel/see a block. Common places for blocks are the head, heart and gut. Those are easy: thoughts (head), emotions (in and around the heart), Self-esteem or digesting food (gut).
So if you sense a block in your head, work on the thoughts that you consistently entertain. If you sense a block in your heart, work on your healing your emotions, if you sense it in your gut, work on self esteem, the concept of releasing and eating cleaner healthier foods and drinking lots of water. Energy can easily get blocked or stuck by food that digests slowly or is made of unnatural ingredients.
Becoming a clear conduit
In order to be a clear channel and to consistently raise your vibration which is what happens when energy is moving un-impeded, you’ll want to think about what is IN your body, heart and mind on a consistent basis. Work on clearing and cleansing your body of negative stuff, material and otherwise.
- A clean and clear conduit had lots of water moving through in addition to energy.
- The food you ingest should be healthy, fresh and natural.
- Getting up and moving your body will also dramatically increase the flow of energy. This is clear to see with children when we tell them to “go run off that energy!” Or the angry or frustrated person who is able to release some of their energy with exercise. Find some version or type of movement or exercise that feels good to you. Haven’t found one? Keep trying. Something will feel good to you. Perhaps it’s dancing or bouncing on a trampoline, swimming or joining an aerobics class. What ever gets you moving, will help increase your energy flow.
- Forgive and release old hurts.
- Get clear about what you control and what you don’t.
- Strengthen your self-love.
- Purify your emotional intentions.
- Release yourself and others from ego-control.
- Cultivate a truly compassionate heart.
- Open your heart and learn to express love to people other than your family and friends.
- Work through your fears.
- Be vigilant about negative self-talk.
- Fully accept compliments.
- Know that the mind is an amazing tool, when directed, it creates in the direction of your intention, left to its own devices, it keeps going, often returning to old thoughts and patterns.
- Recognize that all un-intended thoughts just rise and fall and you do not have to follow them where they go.
- Learn to meditate.
- Work on seeing/thinking the positive aspects of every situation.
- Be aware of what you are feeding into your mind. It is just like a computer: Junk In, Junk out.
- Remember that thoughts become things.
- Think nice, creative, expansive, happy thoughts whenever possible.
Ours and other people’s energy
When you shake a new person’s hand…you’ll feel their grip and their skin…but you may also get a pulse of energy, maybe something electric or something exciting. Maybe you get a sense about their personality, their energy: vibrant or dense, happy or depressed, etc. We don’t have to touch another to get a sense of their energy, though. Just being in their presence can give you a very clear picture.
Perhaps you have people in your life that drain you. People who drain others, (often called energy vampires) don’t care to or haven’t learned how to express energy positively. They use their own energy but seem to need more than is supplied to them, so they suck it out of others. They may have something so emotionally negative inside them (that may or may not be expressed) that all their energy is used up to feed the thing inside them… they then come and try and get your energy, often un-intentionally.
What about folks who perk you up? How do they do that? They have found a way to take the energy that flows through them and to give it back out to the world in a positive manner. That’s all. It’s a choice. It all has to do with how they are filtering their energy, what they create with their energy: positive creation or negative creation or even neutral creation.
So which are you? Now that you know how to let energy flow through you more freely, what will you do with your creative energy? It’s all yours to create the life you want. Everything we see around us came into existence through nature or through humanity. You too have that power: to create! Let the energy flow, rid yourself of limiting beliefs and emotions and stand back…the most powerful force in the universe is creative energy and it flows right through YOU. How will you use it?
How much energy do you spend doing things that don’t feel good? What about things that just don’t feel right? How much of your precious life force is being expended fighting against things or pushing yourself to do something?
Give yourself a break! If something sucks the life out of you, it IS SUCKING THE LIFE OUT OF YOU!
Do you absolutely HAVE to do this thing? Is there someone else that could do it? What would happen if it didn’t get done now? Or ever? What would happen? Would the world come to an end? Can you ask someone to help? Is there someone else who would be much better suited for this?
It’s okay NOT to do something. It’s okay NOT to like something. And it’s better than okay to honor that voice inside you that keeps saying: “I don’t like this”. When are you going to start to listen to that voice? What will it take? How long will you continue to do things that suck your life force? There is almost always another way of acomplishing what needs to be done.
Identify all the things in your life that drain you or that you really don’t like or that feel off or just not right. Make a list, then start brainstorming about ways to take those items OFF your list of responsibility. It is possible, it will take some creativity, some compromise perhaps, but it’s up to you. This life is yours and you are in charge of your actions, your feelings, your behaviors and your own happiness, no one else, YOU!
What are the limits of your life? What are your limitations? Do you like to argue for them? Are you addicted to your excuses? Like to stay stuck? Enjoy the comfort of familiar complaint? What you believe is what you achieve. Don’t forget it!
Okay, okay, I know what you’re thinking… it’s true…there are some real limitations in our world. Yes, it is true that if a person jumps off something high without a glider or parachute, they probably won’t fly. True. It is true that if someone wanted to become a different person all together, physically and mentally, it might be a bit difficult. True. But what I’m talking about are the other limits, the self imposed ones.
Many of us, most of us, spend our lives arguing for limitations that just aren’t real. They are only real in our minds. You might have a long list of why you can’t do the thing that you really want. So, what’s the issue? Why are you talking yourself out of so much? Happy to sit in the suffering pot?
Recognize why you argue for your limitations
Here are some possibilities:
1. If you beat yourself up all the time, chances are, on some level you truly believe in your limitations, mostly due to your loud inner critic who LOVES to tell you how bad you are. Constantly abrading yourself for every little thing? Every thought, every deed? Solution: Stop beating yourself up, absolutely stop it. Catch yourself and stop it. Listen for it when you’re talking and especially pay attention to that inner critic who sometimes just whispers. When you start to listen for it and actively work to stop it, you’ll be amazed. Just remind yourself that you are doing the best you can do right now, it’s ok. Forgive yourself, love yourself AND ABSOLUTELY STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP NOW!
2. You like to use your excuses to keep you from failing….or succeeding. Solution: List your excuses and limitations. Put them down on paper and then look at each and ask : Is this true? Is it really true? If not, strike it and never say it again. If you find an excuse or limitation that may have some validity, look for a work-around. There is ALWAYS a work-around. Don’t kid yourself. Work your way down your list until you’ve gotten them all taken care of. If you still feel stuck…you’ve most likely run into fear. See Fear below, #7.
3. You use your limitations and excuses to keep yourself a Victim. Solution: Work with a Therapist, Counselor, Spiritual Coach, etc. or read books about Victim Mentality. It CAN be changed. You do not have to play victim your whole life. It’s up to you.
4. You use your limitations and excuses to get sympathy. Solution: This is akin to sustaining your position as Victim and getting attention. See Victim above.
5. You speak your limitations and excuses in order to get people to tell you the opposite. Solution: Needing others to overcome your objections of yourself comes from your need for approval from others and lack of self approval. Working on Self-love and Self Worth issues and techniques will help. In the end, the only approval you’ll ever really need is your own.
6. You are comfortable where you are and don’t really want to change anything. Solution: Own it! Stop making excuses and just accept that you are good where you are. There is nothing wrong and nothing needs to be fixed. Be yourself, own your stuff and stop telling a story about something you don’t even want.
7. You are NOT comfortable where you are but are afraid to change things. Solution: Your key here is Fear. Remember, Fear is only an emotion. We ALLLLLLLLL have it. Never think you’re alone on this one. It’s a biggie and the main block to most individual progress. Remember, fear is trying (most of the time) to protect us from some perceived threat. It’s good to pick apart your fear in regard to the issue and ask; “What am I really afraid of”? What is the worst that could happen? What would that look like? How would that feel?” Many times, facing the fear and looking at it deeply and asking …ok, “so what?” will take a lot of the energy out. Go all the way down the rabbit hole to the “worst case scenario” and get to the worst of it and see if you can handle that in your mind. Chances are…you can. Fear is most powerful when we don’t really know what we fear, we just know that it feels bad…so we don’t even want to look that way. But the moment you dissect it, it will lose a great deal of it’s power. There are lots of great books on Fear and you can work with a coach or counselor to work through stuff that seems sticky. Remember, it’s smart to ask for help, less smart not to.
So, the main issues we’re dealing with are Fear and unworthiness. Yuck, these are two biggies. Most of us dance with these two fatties a lot!! But in the end, they are simply emotions and emotions can be handled. Emotions are funny things, when we turn to them, acknowledge them, allow them some room to breathe, they calm down a LOT. When we get to their roots…then we identify what we can do about it. It is just like your own private little investigation and you are the one that gets to solve the mystery!!! How exciting!!!!
1. Know thyself
The first step in empowering yourself is to know and understand yourself. Some great tools to help with seeing yourself objectively are the Myers Briggs indicator -free online test – http://haleonline.com/psychtest/. Just click to the bottom of two pages and find the quick and free test! Then when you find your Myers Briggs four letter indicator, do some research on google! You’ll be amazed! Also, use my Core STTEPs by Hope Tackaberry worksheet to learn more about yourself.
2. Accept thyself
Acceptance includes learning about yourself and accepting what you find. Learning to not only “own” your traits and strengths, but to learn to cherish and love them and LOVE YOURSELF. Also, under “Accept thyself” you’ll find “Forgive thyself”.
3. Nourish thyself
Nourishing ourselves isn’t just about our bodies, it’s also about our minds. Check out a short article on this on our “Power of Thought” page.
4. Grow thyself
Grow thyself by learning what makes you tick, what you want, where you want to go and then by challenging yourself and encouraging yourself (in the ways YOU know best) to move forward.
5. Honor thyself
You are wonderfully made just the way you are. Do you honor and listen to your own wants, needs and thoughts? Do you listen to your body? Are you in touch with the messages your heart and body are sending to you? Honoring yourself is what you do after you have looked at yourself from the inside out and have fully accepted what you find. Then learn to honor your needs and wants. They were given to you for a reason!